choosing connection even when it’s difficult

Hey God, I think you put me with the wrong team. 

These are the words that ran through my head early on in Georgia. More than once. More than twice. I’ll be honest, quite a few times. 

Let me clarify: I don’t feel that way now. It’s been a long process of learning to love and constantly choose into these amazing women of God that have been placed around me. 

You might be wondering what a team is when it comes to the World Race. Basically, I am a part of one large squad (D squad!). We are a squad of about 33, and we all get to go to the same countries together. They split the squad up into teams, and each team consists of about 5-7 people. We are with our teams the whole year. We do ministry with our teams, and every day we have “team time” together. Team time looks like debriefing on the week, giving each other feedback, having fun together, and learning! Each team gets to choose their own name too – my team is “Team Stride”!

When our leadership puts together the teams, it is done thoughtfully and prayerfully. So I knew that the Lord’s hand was present when my team formed. Which brings me back to the first line of this blog. Hey, God, I think you put me with the wrong team. 

Well, let me tell you, He didn’t. And it’s been a long process of learning that.

Maybe you’re having a hard time loving or connecting with the people that surround you. So often we’re in a place we think we don’t belong, surrounded by people we think we don’t “click” with. And we fall into a rhythm of pushing them to the side, writing it off with a shrug of the shoulders and a simple, “We just don’t get each other”. There is something so beautiful about choosing into people we “just don’t get”. What a sad world it would be if we just neglected everyone that we have a hard time connecting with!

Now I can truly say I’m grateful for my team and I can see the ways God so thoughtfully and carefully brought us together. Here’s 3 things I’ve learned from my experience of connecting with my team:

1. Comparison is a killer.

It was so easy to look at other teams who connected from the very beginning and think thoughts of comparison. My team will never be as close or as fun or as whatever as that team. That comparison, however, only created more bitterness and frustration at the fact that team stride was not connecting immediately. I’m so grateful that it took us a minute to click, because now our little team is built on a stronger foundation! So, it’s pretty simple: comparison kills connection. Comparison fosters a spirit of discontent with the place that the Lord has placed you. 

2. Intentionality creates a space for true connection.

Because we didn’t connect from the beginning, my team had to be extra intentional about spending time together even if we didn’t always want to. We had to schedule meal times to eat as a team because we were hardly ever spending time together outside of team time. This created a space for conversation and laughter. Being intentional doesn’t always have to look like spending time together. It can be a quick “how are you?”, buying them a coffee, or even just praying for them. Like I said, we didn’t always want to spend our meals together. But that time created a space for the Lord to work and foster connections that weren’t coming easy to us.

3. Creativity is necessary for connection.

Doing ministry together made everything fall into place for my team. We saw a different side of each other, and realized that each person contributed something unique! We realized that we work together so incredibly well. Not only that, but ministry just allowed us to bond! Making space outside of daily life for connection is essential. Get creative with it! Sometimes seeing the people around you in a different light or different space will bring the perspective that is necessary for connection.

Whether it’s your coworkers, family, or classmates – there are always going to be people that it’s difficult to connect with and choose into. But when we work through that difficulty, often on the other side there are meaningful, deep, God-given connections and friendships! 

Who in your life are you having a hard time connecting with right now? How can you intentionally choose into them?

I hope these tips helped or encouraged you in some way today, friend! I am thankful for you! 

AAAND now, a very special announcement! Are you ready?!

In January, my squad and I are heading to Costa Rica where we will have the opportunity to partner with local ministries in and around San Jose! I am SO excited to continue to live out all that I’ve been learning and growing in these past three months in Georgia! More info to come!

God bless and HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Emma

PS: Here’s a cute picture of me and my team! I love them a whole lot!